17 February 2012

Toilet Humor

Why do kids think poop is the funniest thing ever?  If there were 100 kids in a room and one of them yells POOP!  I bet you anything it will make the other 99 keel over with laughter.  With the earthlings it only takes one mention of the word poop to set off a whole chain of not very funny and absolutely disgusting poop related interjections.  Aiden is in the endearing age where poop is constantly in his thoughts, jokes, conversations and even his songs.  It is much more than calling his brother a poopoo head or  making silly and nonsensical poop jokes.  He has made songs about poop.  More precisely he substitutes words in sweet nursery rhymes and begins a total poopfest.

Twinkle, twinkle little poop.
How I wonder how you poop.
Up above the poop so high.
Like a poop in the toilet.

You get the picture.

As you can see from his terribly revolting song this new theme of his is not limited to poop alone, it includes toilets as well.  Why the hell not go for the full effect, right?  Just the other day he tells me that at school he invented a game for him and his classmates.  They had to go inside the toilet, swim and the first one that comes out in the other toilet is the winner.  When I asked him who won he said no one played the game.  Gee, I wonder why?  At Gael's football practice he supports his big brother by yelling GO TOILET! Loud enough for all the soccer parents to hear.  Ummm, yes that's my kid with the toilet cheers.

It still doesn't end here.  It seems poop thoughts have been heavy on Aiden's mind.  He now wants to know scientific facts why poop stinks and why we have to do the deed at all.  Apparently he has also done his own investigation and has come to the conclusion that there is a conveyor belt in his butt that makes him poop.  Lastly, yes I will finally conclude this lovely post and put an end to your wretched misery if you've actually gotten this far, he has resolved that farts are poop bubbles without the poop.

Delightful, isn't he?